3 months

We finally crossed the 3 months milestone. First 3 months are supposed to be the most challenging period of parenting.

Thanks to my mom who has been losing sleep for my sake, I was able to cross this period without much issues. I have no idea how I would have managed this phase alone. Yet my mom did cross this phase alone, with me as a small baby. I now realize how important it is to have your mom by your side during these testing times. I cannot thank her enough for sacrificing her sleep and managing home and baby alone, even though she is not physically fit or energetic like others.

I joined few mommy forums but I am thinking of leaving them. Most of the times, I see people judging others for something or the other. If someone chooses to not breastfeed or has some trouble breastfeeding, people pounce on that person as if she has committed some sin. I mean, there is a whole generation of Americans who grew up only on formula milk and they are still alive. Also people overdo everything. Either they feed only formula or they breastfeed even a 5 year old kid.

I tried using cloth diapers, again thanks to all the judgmental posts about how cloth diapers are so much better. I was convinced that the disposable ones are terrible. But guess what happened. After trying cloth diapers and seeing how difficult they are to put them on a wriggling baby, I decided to switch back to disposable ones. Disposable ones are so much cooler and better. They even have an indicator that shows when the diaper is wet. With a cloth diaper, you need to keep checking if it is wet. Also you have to put a cover on top, else your precious carpet will be full of pee and poop.

After seeing how useless these advice are, I have decided to stop listening to people on what to do and how to do. Better follow your own instincts, instead of listening to other women.

One issue that I am suffering from is the guilt. I have started going back to work and hardly get to spend anytime with the junior these days. He doses off to sleep by the time I come home, he is sleepy in the morning when I leave. I hate going to office. If you are about to say “why don’t you work from home?”, I am not allowed to. That’s how it works in my team. But I am at least not worried, since he is in safe (safer) hands. I wish we had one year maternity leave in US, like in so many other countries.

I have a misogynist in my friends list. I have unfollowed him after seeing some disturbing status updates on my timeline. Being an educated man, if he can insult women, I am not sure what to think about other men in India.

I saw a boy removing items from a shelf in the store, the other day. His parents did not even tell him to not do that. The sales rep had spent hours to arrange items on the racks earlier. Another day at the pharmacy, I saw a boy removing tablet containers, shaking them vigorously and then keeping them back. His father was standing next to him looking at the scene. This is something I don’t want to do. I want to make sure I correct my boy when needed.

I see parents handing over iPhone to their kid at restaurants, just to have a peaceful meal. I do not want to introduce my son to smartphones or tablets for few years. I want him to play, read and learn. I am still thinking about TV and movies. Not sure when to introduce them to him. I think later the better.

I have started taking my son on walks. He loves them. I am reading to my son. But I guess, he is too young for that. He hardly pays any attention and is not that interested. I will continue reading to him. I want him to be a reader like me. I want him to be good at reading and writing, which most boys are not so good at.

I think the enthusiasm that I had before he was born is gone now. I am so out of energy these days. Whenever I get time, I try to catch some sleep or read. I have stopped watching TV completely. I cannot believe this myself, being a TV addict. I have lost interest in watching TV or movies.

8 thoughts on “3 months

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  1. Read your post 3 times. Here are my thoughts. Mommy forums are waste of time. Whatever you say, it will be criticized by somebody. Disposable diapers are better. You are reading to your son! That is a good thing to do. May be you can start by singing to him. At this age, he will more appreciate it.

    I know there will be a day when he will be going to school and you are at work. A cell phone is absolutely necessary. May not be a smart phone. At least a basic cell phone (with voice only). It is needed in case you/your hubby want to contact him for an emergency OR he wants to contact his parents for an emergency.

    Please try to keep up the routine. Read books. Watch movies.


    1. Yeah I guess I cannot avoid not getting him cell phone.Peer pressure will also be there. He will see his friends with phones and would want one for himself, probably even before he goes to school.
      Need to make some time to get back to the old routine. But don’t know how to watch TV, without making him watch it. 😦


  2. Managing a kid is difficult for the first 2.5 years. After that, they get some maturity, especially once they mingle with other people and kids in pre-school. Just make it a point not to get intimidated by their crying. A lot of times, kids use it as a weapon 😛

    Destination Infinity


  3. Don’t give up on the internet Ash. It will be ur best friend soon. Take the advice, Not worry about what ppl say. I read a lot of parenting articles. I follow some on FB. I read and decide what I want to do. I don’t care what comments ppl post on these. I recently read an article about how a 4 year old died of asphyxiation from cinnamon powder in pantry, that mom wrote an article for raising awareness. You wont believe one person wrote a comment on this article saying, “So, what do you want me to keep the pantry doors locked?” Can you believe it? We have to quickly ignore these because we need the advice we can get. I don’t follow any of Indian parenting blogs, though 😉


    1. Yeah Dil. Internet is quite helpful sometimes. I should keep up with the parenting forums I guess. Some people are really rude on the Internet, but there are folks who have been helpful. I need to find some good parenting blogs. I have not been reading many parenting blogs.


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